Comments on: What To Do When You Feel Like You’re Losing Memories

By: Kim Murray

Kim Murray — Thu, 04 Feb 2021 13:39:48 +0000

In reply to Jayne.

Hi Jayne, I’m curious why you haven’t gone to the cemetery? Or don’t feel like you were married for 53 years? Are you avoiding the more unpleasant and difficult feelings that come with grief? This may be the culprit in your “memory loss.” The thing is, you can’t avoid unpleasant feelings forever. Your husband died and you’re allowed to be sad about it. We humans try in vain to avoid the more uncomfortable feelings, but in reality avoiding unpleasant feelings only makes them stick around longer. Let yourself feel whatever you need to feel, Jayne. It’s in the feeling and processing that we begin to heal.

By: Jayne

Jayne — Thu, 04 Feb 2021 07:03:44 +0000

I am a widow for one year! My husband died here at home after a lengthly 4 year illness. He was semi comatose for the last year. While understanding his passing was a blessing for him. He was both a good husband & father! My problem is I don’t remember or feel like I was married for 53 years! If I talk to a stranger about him I cry! But otherwise void of emotion! I haven’t gone to the cemetery since his burial! My daughter mourns him. I am confused! Jayne

By: Lori

Lori — Mon, 11 Jan 2021 11:46:39 +0000

In reply to Kim Murray. Brittany, I am feeling the same exact way now. I thought I was a horrible wife for not being able to picture him or remember any details of him. Thank you for sharing your experience and making me feel “normal”.

By: Kim Murray

Kim Murray — Sat, 26 Sep 2020 09:45:55 +0000

In reply to Brittany Ann Powers. Hi Brittany, so many of us feel like we're the "only one" experiencing what many other widows face. We all go through those roller-coaster emotions ❤.

By: Brittany Ann Powers

Brittany Ann Powers — Sat, 26 Sep 2020 02:51:02 +0000

Your article was exactly what I needed to read. I lost my husband 16 days ago to pneumonia. Some days I can hear or even smell him. Other days it’s like he just went poof. I have trouble remembering all the time we had. My brain mostly wants to focus on the day he died. The days I manage to forget for a little while, my guilt returns with a vengeance at night. Last couple of days my mind won’t even let me recall his face. It’s like a wall goes up 100ft high and 100ft thick. Its comforting to know I’m not the only one who feels like they are dishonoring their loved ones by “forgetting” them. I thought I was going crazy till I read this. Thank you