This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my affiliate policy for more information.
Short and Sweet Summary: How would it make you feel if you didn’t have to pay full price ever again, especially on big-ticket items? The key to any negotiation starts with asking first and then following these hassle-free negotiation tips every widow should know. Why leave money on the table for someone else?
Why is it so hard for widows to ask for what we want?
If you’ve watched other people negotiate and get better deals on cars, cable bills or items for sale on Facebook marketplace, you might be thinking, I could never do that.
Well, the truth is, with a little practice you can do that. You can learn how to negotiate just about anything, but there’s one simple thing you need to do first.
You have to be willing to ask.
If you’re not asking for a better price on something, you’ll never get one. And the crazy thing is, there are so many things you can negotiate that you may not even be aware of. You don’t have to pay the list price on anything from cars to furniture to medical bills to jewelry.
Think about that for a minute. How would it make you feel if you didn’t have to pay full price ever again, especially on big-ticket items?
The key to any negotiation starts with asking first and following these hassle-free negotiation tips every widow should know. Why leave money on the table for someone else?
By taking time to practice these negotiation tips every widow should know, you can summon your courageous alter ego and start getting the discounts everyone else is getting. And feel more confident about the process before you even begin.
DO YOUR RESEARCH
Before you do anything else, you need to know the facts about what you’re negotiating for. If you think your job is worth a raise, first look up what the median salary is for your position. There’s no sense in asking for a raise if your ask is too high. If you’re looking at a buying a new or used car, find out what other cars of that make and model typically sell for.
When I bought a used car last year I searched several dealerships for the price of the same make and model year. It’s surprising the difference in price from one dealership to the next. Or even one model year to the next. I took the average cost of what I found to set a top price for myself. In my mind, I wouldn’t pay more one more cent than this top price because I would negotiate down from there.
When you have an average price or median range figured out ahead of time, it will make the negotiation easier because you won’t be asking for something that’s out of range to begin with.
TAKE YOUR EGO OUT OF THE EQUATION
You can’t negotiate successfully if you’re worried you’ll look bad for asking. Thoughts like, what will they think of me? and I must look like a cheapskate are just your ego’s way of protecting you from a perceived failure. Your ego tries to talk you out of if before you even begin!
But these thoughts originate in your brain, not someone else’s. When you take your ego out of the equation, you understand your ego is protecting you from your own thoughts, not actual events.
Will the other person really think you’re a cheapskate for asking for a reduced price? Probably not. We are our own worst critics and other people don’t spend half as much time thinking about our actions as we think they do.
When you go into a negotiation with the thought that a salesperson expects customers to ask for discounts, your ego can’t argue with that. And your boss may respect you more for having the guts to ask for that raise.
Put those thoughts into your head instead.
In the end, you shouldn’t be asking yourself the question, what will people think of me? The more important question is, what will you think of you if you don’t ask?
HE WHO SPEAKS FIRST LOSES
Negotiating is a game of back and forth, right? One person makes an offer. The other person makes a counteroffer.
The trick is to know the opening price before making your offer. You’ll either know the ballpark rang from your research or the actual sticker price on the product. When you’re ready to negotiate, it’s best not to say anything until you get the current asking price. Once you have the starting number, you have something to work with as you make your counteroffer.
Once you’ve countered, it’s time to use silence as a negotiation tool. When the salesperson doesn’t immediately respond to your offer, you might start to get nervous. But don’t say anything just yet. It’s incredibly difficult to sit in this silent space, but if you start talking to try and fill the silence, you might also begin making unintentional concessions. By taking turns and waiting for the next counteroffer, you won’t wind up bidding yourself right out of a deal.
Every salesperson on the planet already knows how to use silence as a negotiation tool. The golden rule in any negotiation is, “he who speaks first loses.” When this negotiation tactic is used against you, try hard to resist the temptation to fill the void.
Instead, ask for a moment to think about it or excuse yourself for a drink of water.
EXPECT A NO
The fear of rejection is a classic reason why most people don’t negotiate. I mean, no one really likes to hear the word “no,” right? Most people go out of their way to avoid this response. This is probably the simplest negotiation tip every widow should know.
However, if you expect the other person will say no, you can come up with a backup plan before you even begin. The word no doesn’t have to mean the end of the conversation or negotiation.
As soon as someone says no, the next possible segue could be, “I understand. What other possible solutions are available?”
REQUEST SOME UPGRADES
If you’re still not happy with the final price, see what else the other person is willing to throw in for free to sweeten the deal. You’d be amazed at the extras you can pick up just by asking.
Even if your boss won’t budge on salary, you can still negotiate for something else, like benefits or additional vacation days. Or if the car salesman says the sticker price is his best offer, ask for a series of free oil changes, a tow package or an aftermarket DVD player.
When I bought my new car (it was a used car, but new to me), the salesperson said it would come with a 1/2 tank of gas. I said, “why not a full tank?” And the salesperson explained that new car buyers get a full tank of gas but used car buyers only get a 1/2 tank. Which I thought was a stupid rule!
So I asked for a full tank of gas.
He said no because this rule came from management and there wasn’t much he could do blah, blah, blah. Well, I wasn’t happy with that answer so I said, “Do you really think your manager would want you to lose a deal over a 1/2 tank of gas?”
I mean, really?
He excused himself to “talk to his manager” and came back with the answer I wanted. He decided I could get full tank of gas. Let’s be real, it probably cost the dealership a measly $30, so it’s not like they made thousands of dollars in concessions. But it made me feel better.
Be creative and ask for one or two free upgrades that are minimal in cost to the business, but make you feel like you won the lottery.
IT’S NOT PERSONAL
When you ask for a discount or extra incentives included in your purchase, it doesn’t mean anything about you as a person. And if the salesman agrees or disagrees with your request it doesn’t mean anything about him as person.
The bottom line is, the salesperson is out to make a profit. As a consumer, you’re out to get a deal. In either case it’s not personal, it’s just a business transaction.
TAKE YOUR TIME
You might be tempted to close the deal quickly and to take what you can get. And that’s understandable, especially when you’re sweating buckets or your hands are noticeably shaking. So, here’s where you need to take time to think about the offer.
The salesperson will likely be pushing you for a decision because he knows the longer you wait to make one the less likely it will be in his favor. But you have every right to take as much time as you need and go over the terms and conditions carefully before making a final decision.
WALK AWAY IF YOUR TERMS AREN’T MET
If you’ve asked for what you want (within reason), your counteroffer is denied, and the salesperson isn’t willing to budge any further or offer any other concessions, you can always walk out of the negotiation. When you’re willing to leave the table if your terms aren’t met, it shows you mean business.
There’s no sense in giving something up unless you’re getting something in return. When you concede too much, you’re building up your opponent to reduce your options even further. If It’s gotten to the point where this transaction is no longer a viable option for you, you can feel confident in ending the negotiation.
WIDOW WRAP UP
If you want to save some money and get a good deal on something, you have to ask. And as soon as you ask, you’ve started the negotiation process. It can be scary and intimidating at first, but with so much potential for a positive outcome, it just makes sense to try.
Overall, it’s not hard to get what you want from someone else, provided you’re willing to do your research, stand your ground and not take things personally.
By taking time to practice these negotiation tips every widow should know, you can start getting the discounts everyone else is getting.
And feel more confident about the process before you even begin.
Want even more negotiating tactics to try? Click here to learn more.